


Middle Finer (to my heart)

by josthockeythings



Series: Nate and Tyson are in Love [5]
Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: Angst, Fingering, Fluff, Gay Sex, M/M, Saddness, Smut, anxiety mention ish, little bit, self doubt, so much, soooo much, this is self indulgent really, trade stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-02
Updated: 2019-07-02
Packaged: 2020-06-02 14:26:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19443286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/josthockeythings/pseuds/josthockeythings
Summary: Tyson gets the news of his trade while on his trip to Nova Scotia to visit Nate on Canada Day. Things go downhill from there...





	Middle Finer (to my heart)

**Author's Note:**

> First. If you found this by googling yourself or someone you know, turn back NOW!!!! You've been warned... This is fiction. It is made up about public figures with information that is public knowledge. Everything else is MADE UP!!!!! 
> 
> Next, writing is a good way to process emotions. So, this is me processing my emotions about The Trade. I'm super super upset. So, this is the fic concerning Tyson Barrie because I love him with my whole heart and don't want him to leave. It's too much. So, the angst is all Sakics fault if you wanted someone to blame. (It who I do.) There will be another fic to follow, probably tomorrow, and probably just as late concerning Alexander and the roommates, don't you worry. 
> 
> This is also mildly a timestamp/sequel to my previous work A Daydream Away from years ago, that I sadly never wrote the actual sequel for because that's a lot of work guys! Anyway, this can absolutely, one hundred percent be read as a standalone. But if you'd like to check out my other work, I'd love you forever, and good luck because it's loooooong. 
> 
> Anyway, finally thank you to aj for beta'ing for me so quickly and so late! I just needed get this written and out there. Kind of to dispell my own emotions with it... 
> 
> Title from Phoebe Ryan's song Middle Finger (on Josty's vibey spotify playlist.)
> 
> *Alternate Title: I'm Not Ok from Kygo's song Not Ok (also on Josty's vibey spotify playlist)

Tyson is with a bunch of friends when he gets the call. He got into Nova Scotia yesterday to celebrate Canada with Nate. This was the very last thing he expected. He just bought a house down the street from Nate, got a dog, was ready to settle the fuck down and be an Av for the rest of his career. He’s in so much shock that he doesn’t even realize his agent hung up. He’s just standing there, in the middle of the sidewalk, stuck in place, phone at his ear.

It’s Nate who gets him to come around. It’s a hand at his shoulder then a concerned boyfriend in front of his face. “Babe, you good?” Nate asks softly.

Tyson swallows and lets the hand with his phone come down to his side. He doesn’t know if he’s going to be able to say it out loud without bursting into tears in public. He can already feel that they’re ready to go.

“Deep breath. In and out,” Nate says.

Tyson takes two deep breathes counting to 4 on the intake and output of both, like his therapist taught him. “I’m going to Toronto.”

Nate’s face scrunches up. “What? When? What’s in Toronto for you?”

Tyson swallows. He doesn’t get it. Nate doesn’t understand what he’s saying. How could he? This was never something they planned for. This was something they never thought would happen. Sakic knew. Sakic knew how much Denver meant to Tyson, knew that he never wanted to play anywhere else. And he did it anyway.

He shakes his head. Nate puts a hand on either cheek and wipes at the tears spilling over. “What’s the matter?” he asks softly.

“I’ve been traded.” By the time Tyson gets the full sentence out, he’s sobbing, chest wracking sobs that he can’t stop no matter how hard he wants to. Nate pulls him close, holding him tight against his chest, not letting anyone see the full on breakdown he’s having on the side of the road.

“Here,” Tyson hears Sid say. Then, they’re being dragged, and Tyson is being shoved in the back of a car. He’s still wrapped in Nate’s tight embrace, but somewhere mildly more private.

Tyson can’t be more grateful for Nate. He doesn’t say any bullshit like ‘It’s going to be okay’ because they both know it’s not. He just holds him, rubbing his back and kissing his head.

“What are we going to do,” Tyson whines, when he finally has enough control of himself to speak.

Nate just shakes his head and kisses Tyson again. “It doesn’t matter. We will adjust. We’ll make it work.”

“What if we can’t?” Tyson asks, small and quiet.

Nate pulls back, holding Tyson’s face in his hands. “We will. I don’t care about the long-distance bullshit. We will make this work.”

When Tyson has mostly calmed down, and his face doesn’t look like a puffy tomato, they get out of the car Sid pulled them into and try to continue about their day. It’s hard. Tyson can’t really focus on anything. He doesn’t even realize what Biz said in his stupid little video. When he does, he has to laugh and turn around so he doesn’t break out into sobs again.

“Hey,” Nate says, pulling Tyson in with an arm over his shoulder. “Let’s go home. We don’t have to get dinner with these guys.”

Tyson just nods. He, suddenly no longer trusts himself to speak.

Nate tightens his grip on Tyson’s shoulder when he looks up. “Hey, guys. I think we’re gonna call it. Enjoy the night!”

Sid waves with a sad smile on his face. Biz waves in an over-the-top gesture that only Biz would think is appropriate. Nate shuttles Tyson off into an Uber waiting for them right there. Tyson’s not sure when Nate ordered it, but he’s really glad he did. They go back to their hotel, Tyson with his head on Nate’s shoulder. He barely feels like he’s human right now and he just needs all the contact with Nate he can get.

He’s pulled out of the car and directed to Nate’s house in Nova Scotia. It feels about as home as his new house in Denver feels. The difference is this one has more things that make is distinctly Nate’s which instantly puts him more at ease.

“I’m gonna order take-out. What do you want?” Nate asks as they sit down on the couch together.

Tyson shrugs.

“Well, you’ve gotta eat something, babe,” Nate says softly.

Tyson nods.

“If I just order will you eat it?” Nate asks.

Tyson nods again.

Nate gives Tyson a soft kiss on the cheek before getting up. Tyson whimpers, but it’s quiet enough that he’s not actually sure he made a noise. It doesn’t take long for Nate to come back. He curls into Nate’s side when he sits down, and Nate tugs him closer. Tyson’s not sure how long they lay like that, but eventually there’s a knock at the door and Nate has to untangle himself to get their food.

Tyson lets Nate feed him small bites of Thai. Tyson does whine when Nate gets up to get rid of the take-out boxes but is placated when he comes back with a bowl of Tyson’s favorite ice cream. Tyson leans against Nate and lets himself be fed spoonfuls of ice cream. It’s the most domestic and quiet night they’ve had in a long while.

Eventually, the bowl is empty, and Nate has to lean forward to put it on the coffee table. “Let’s go to bed,” he says quietly.

Tyson is just as clingy going to bed. It’s when they get to bed things get interesting. As soon as the backs of Tyson’s legs hit the bed, all he can think about is how badly he wants to be fucked. He reels Nate is close and kisses that spot on his neck that Tyson knows has an extremely visceral effect on him. Nate shudders under Tyson’s hands, tilting his head to give Tyson a little more access.

Nate pushes Tyson away at his shoulders. His look isn’t concerned or worried as he considers Tyson in front of him. He looks inquisitive. “Is this what you want?” Nate asks.

And, until very recently, the answer would’ve probably been no. When the news first struck, Tyson’s only thought was how he wanted to curl up in bed with Nate and never leave. But, now, all he wants is to have Nate this way at least one last time, because he knows their nights are limited. So, Tyson nods. “I just want you,” he says as earnestly has he ever has.

With that Nate surges forward and kisses Tyson in the fiercest kiss Tyson thinks he’s ever experienced. Nate cups Tyson’s face in both hands and kisses with passion. Tyson gets his hands onto Nate’s head, curling his fingers in his hair. Nate pushes forward until Tyson has to sit down on the bed. Nate climbs on and straddles Tyson’s lap as he sits down. They’re both already hard and pressing against their pants. He grinds down onto Tyson as he gently presses on the hinge on Tyson’s jaw. Tyson mouth drops and suddenly the kiss is so much more intense.

Nate lets a hand drop and gets it under Tyson’s shirt. Tyson gasps, and it deepens the kiss. Nate’s hand runs up Tyson’s firm torso forcing the shirt up with it. They break their kiss for only a moment, for the shirt to slide up and over Tyson’s arms. Tyson scrambles to pull Nate’s off too. They end up getting tangled in the shirt together and break out in laughter. They fall back onto the bed together and wrestle each other out of the stupid thing.

Tyson runs his hands up the side of Nate’s sides, savoring every inch. He doesn’t know when this won’t be his anymore, no matter how many times Nate says they’ll make it work. Now he knows any moment could be his last, his last for a few weeks, a few months, forever. He will never know. So, he has to get what he can now.

Nate cradles the back of Tyson’s head and tightens his grip on Tyson’s curls. He pulls Tyson in and kisses him slowly, carefully, guiding him though it step by step with the care of someone who is genuinely in love with who they are kissing. And Tyson lets himself fall for it. He lets himself fall for the love because it’s what he wants. It’s what he never wants to give up.

So, he lets Nate push him back onto the bed. He lets Nate kiss down his chest. He kisses along the waistband of his jeans. He gently opens the buttons and gets his hands back around Tyson’s ass to slide the jeans and boxers off. Tyson’s dick smacks his stomach when Nate gets the boxers down far enough. It leaves a sticky mark of precome on his lower belly. Nate takes a moment to wiggle out of his own pants. Tyson gets a second to admire Nate, fully naked and erect in front of him, before Nate bends back down to lick the mark Tyson’s dick left moments before.

Tyson groans and throws his head back with his eyes closed. He wants to watch every moment of this, but it feels impossible right now, with all the emotions he’s feeling and sensations on his body. Nate takes Tyson down his throat in one go, forcing practically a sob from Tyson . It’s so, so very good. It’s almost unbearable at the same time. Nate is an expert in Tyson’s body, and most importantly his tells. Like when Tyson finally reaches down to get his fingers in Nate’s hair, he knows it’s the perfect time to pull off and give Tyson and stupidly sloppy kiss.

Tyson giggles and pushes Nate away.

“What do you need, babe?” Nate asks between breaths.

“Fuck me, please,” Tyson moans.

Nate smiles that stupid, fond smile, that Tyson loves so much because that’s exactly what that smile is: love. (It punches him in the chest harder than it should.) Nate reaches to the bedside table and pulls the lube out. Tyson watches him warm it up in his fingers before pressing one in. Tyson squirms on it, not trying to get comfortable, but trying to ask Nate for more, without actually asking Nate for more. They both know he can take more than this on the first go. He’s done it on multiple occasions. One of those being last night after Tyson’s flight had landed. But, Nate doesn’t take the bait. He slowly and gently pumps the finger in and out over and over again, until there’s a sheen of sweat building on Tyson’s forehead and every sound coming out of his is a small, pathetic whine. 

Two feels like a miracle, and Tyson just has to sigh when Nate sticks a second in. He pumps them in and out a few times, before he starts to scissor them apart and really stretch him. It torturous for the next few minutes as Nate alternates between the two.

Tyson full on groans when Nate pushes three in. After the careful opening with three, Tyson starts to fuck himself down onto Nate’s fingers because it doesn’t seem like they’re going to get anywhere at this rate.

Nate kisses Tyson’s stomach, trying to placate him. “Why do you have to be so impatient? We have all the time in the world.”

Tyson wants to shout, “No we don’t!” He wants to feel like his heart isn’t going to beat out of his chest for a moment. He wants to be able to hold himself together and not feel like his life is falling apart around him. But, honestly, he feels like he’s going to crumble with it. Instead, he just groans and pushes down on Nate’s fingers again.

Nate rolls his eyes, in the fond way he does at basically anything dumb Tyson does. He straightens up and pulls his fingers out slowly. He rolls a condom on slowly, keeping eye contact with Tyson the entire time. Tyson licks his lips, not at all suggestively just in prep. He slides in slowly, which is more tortuous than pleasurable at this point. Tyson has been ready for this for so long. He just wants to be fucked to the point of insanity.

And luckily for him, no matter how awful he can be, Tyson’s boyfriend always knows exactly what he wants and when to give it to him. So, that’s exactly what happens. Nate plants his hands on either side of Tyson’s head, gets Tyson’s legs wrapped around his hips and goes to town. Tyson grips the sheets, gasping as Nate pounds into him. This is what he wanted, what he needed. He wanted to feel this. He wanted to feel this so, so much that he forgot everything else, literally couldn’t think about anything else. He wants to be entirely and utterly possessed by Nate, to be Nate’s in every term of the word. He reaches up and wraps his arms around Nate’s shoulder and shudder as his body jerks and he comes harder than he ever thinks he has before. He takes a few breaths and collapses on the bed, letting Nate use him to his own satisfaction which comes moments later.

Tyson lays curled next to Nate, basking in the afterglow. He feels so good, like he belongs somewhere again, even if it’s not Denver. It’s somewhere better. He belongs in Nate’s heart. And, no matter how much his head is telling him, he won’t belong there forever, he’d gonna let his heart tell him he does now and that’s all that matters.

It feels like fireworks are going off in his stomach, with how much he’s feeling right now. How much good stuff he’s feeling right now. That is, right up until actually fireworks go off over the lake. Tyson jerks up. “Oh my god! I can’t believe I ruined our Canada Day night!” Tyson shrieks.

Nate chuckles and reels Tyson back down onto the bed and kisses his sweat head. “You didn’t ruin it. I got to spend Canada Day with the only piece of Canada I really care about.”

Tyson can’t help but beam and let himself be manhandled into the curve of Nate’s body. Yeah, Nate is Tyson’s favorite piece of Canada too.

**Author's Note:**

> If you made it this far, thank you soo soo soo soo much for reading! I love each and every one of you! Please, if you liked it leave kudos, and if you loved it and are feeling the same things I am, please drop a comment so we can cry together! Love y'all!
> 
> *(Does Tyson do anything other than whine/wine?)


End file.
